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, by Gloria G. Brame
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Product details
File Size: 949 KB
Print Length: 338 pages
Publisher: Touchstone; Original ed. edition (February 29, 2000)
Publication Date: February 29, 2000
Sold by: Simon and Schuster Digital Sales Inc
Language: English
ASIN: B002OK2ODA
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Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#730,567 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
This is a marvelous, revealing tome. It's wonderful to read a book written by an author who obviously knows their subject. I happened upon the reference book mostly by accident and I consider myself very lucky to have done so. The author points out that in her book "all sexual behaviors that occur by consent among mentally competent adults are seen as acceptable, valid, and normal expressions of adult sexuality." She begins with a lengthy discussion of what is normal sexual practice, which is lengthy because the definition has varied so greatly throughout history and in different societies. She then gives the curious reader some simple tests to take to determine their own "Kink Quotient" and "Ready or Not?" quiz "as a guide in your journey towards a fuller understanding of your own sexual identity." All of us have been puzzled by unexpected reactions we've experienced from certain stimuli. Sometimes the surprise reactions are quite sexual when the stimulus doesn't seem sexual at all. All of us have had reoccurring dreams and daydreams that have been with us for our entire life. Most of us have certain seeming insatiable desires--be it for chocolate, shoes, clothing made of certain types of materials, romance novels where the heroine is carried off by the pirate or the lady imprisoned in the tower is rescued and rides off into the sunset with her knight in shining armor. Many of these compulsions to collect such items as shoes and clothing are really fetishes. Many of our dreams of being swept off our feet by the handsome pirate, barbarian, sports figure, soldier, etc. are also signs of deeper sexual needs and unspoken desires. What this book does for the searcher or the just plain curious, is to help them to find themselves: to answer unspoken, but nagging questions that have been in their subconscious for as long as they can recall, and once insight is obtained, how to explore those newly discovered worlds. Terms such as "kink" and "fetish" are explained. Relationships such as S&M, D&S, BDSM and "Power Exchange" are defined and illustrated. There is a fascinating section entitled "Talking Points on Sex and God." There is an exhaustive glossary of terms in the back of the book. The discussion of the differences between Role-Playing (usually private and very temporary) and Lifestyles (permanent and often public) is fascinating. Most everybody fits into the role-playing scene at least sometime in his or her life. Most everyone has experienced unexpected erotic reactions and dreams. It's the norm. Reading this excellent reference book will help people answer some of their unspoken questions and in many cases, get over their dark fears and doubts. It's excellent therapy. Enlightenment is healing. The book also has all the expected details of the chief forms of S&M, the types and descriptions of sexual toys often included in such play, advice on safe sex, mutual consent and psychological ramifications of such activity plus much, much more. Many readers will discover that they aren't kinky at all, or only a little kinky, or a kink genius, but wherever the individual reader discovers him or herself to be, the reader will have a much deep understanding of the world of kink and the people who inhabit that world. They will also understand why they are so turned on by certain movies, songs, plays, books and people or what they may be wearing. The term "Fetish" comes from a medieval term, which refers to religious relics believed to possess magical properties. They will understand that some people can have fetishes for almost anything including "vaccination scars." There is simply no limit to what some people get sexually aroused over and most of it's pretty harmless. The book also provides ways to tell if one is being abused and what to do about that. If the book does nothing else it will open the reader's eyes to many of the otherwise un-noticed references and erotic symbols found in all art. The book is worth reading even if one is only curious. For others, reading this book will provide a brightly lighted path to self-understanding, peace and unexpected and fulfilling fun. This reader can hardly wait to read the author's other books.
I enjoyed this very practical, beginners book on the power-exchange art form & would recommend it to noobies even above Wiseman's SM 101 (Which is still a great book.) Brame's first book,DIFFERENT LOVING was also an outstanding book, but it was more of an in depth treatise on the lifestyle. This one is a more concise, playful manual & as such it will definitely give those who are just now becoming aware of their kink predilections a solid intro as well as some much needed practical advise. I would highly suggest coupling this book with Wiseman's SM-101 as well for even more technical education, but it will prove more than sufficient all on it's own should you decide to just go with one at a time. One thing that I love above all else is the fact that Brame goes out of her way to establish a simple, obvious truth for the sake of the uninitiated that those of us in the lifestyle have known all along; KINK is every bit as much of the players INHERENT SEXUAL ORIENTATION as heterosexuality, homosexuality & every other form of sex between consenting adults. I regret having to give anything away, but her discovery of a KINK POSITIVE study done by none other than the UNITED STATES CENTRAL INTELLIGENCE AGENCY is just the kind of research you can expect from this author!Seller did well too-no complaints.
I was onlg able to read a little over half of this book before I just couldn't stand the writing style any more. the content is mature, the writing however is not. try Kate kinsey's how to be a healthy submissive to get a taste of far superior writing.
The book covers many different topics and should help many different people.
Not the unashamed and experienced. Probably much better for beginner's. Gloria Brame is amazing. For a more advanced insight with a more academic/intellectual angle read her book Different Loving. This doesn't have any instructional aspects. It's more of a basic introduction to culture and terminology and getting over your self consciousness and shame.
great book
It's difficult to find books about BDSM that aren't too trite, too painfully technical, or too full of rhetoric along the lines of "THIS IS THE ONLY WAY TO DO THIS THAT OR THE OTHER". This book is definitely different. I really enjoyed how honest and straightforward she is in describing various BDSM activities and relationships, but I also love her candid humour like the various lists.This book is user-friendly, but depicts a real picture of the many ways kinksters do "what it is that we do".Definitely a great add to any sexual studies collection!!!
Very well written, complete information. Tells you what you need to know without being too graphic. Good advice for a couple beginning to explore the lifestyle, good advice if you are the partner that is introducing a little kink into an established relationship or if you have a partner that is asking to explore the possibilities.
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